Why is today John Philip Sousa Day?

Because he told everyone to march fourth.

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Why is ur wife shouting at you?

Friend: she told me to upload her photo in FB, I uploaded in OLX... Mistakes do happen

How can you tell a black person is lying?

His lips are moving.

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What's not 50% off today?

Health insurance

What do you want to work on today?

Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet

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What did the physics professor shout when he disproved Hooke's Law in early to mid March?

Spring break!

Why are the streets in Paris lined with trees?

So the German soldiers can march in shade.

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What day do soldiers hate the most?

March Fourth

Why is today John Philip Sousa Day?

Because he told everyone to march fourth.