How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do pirates know they exist?

They think, therefore they ARRRRRRRR!

What do Baptists and cats have in common?

You know they're doing it, you just can't catch them at it.

Start Jokes More Start Jokes

How can you make a small fortune?

start with a big one

What do you call a computer that says hello to you when you start it up?

A Dell.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

How did you prepare for today?

red carpet question with "Cocaine and sit ups." #GoldenGlobes

What did the dog say after a hard day at work ?

Today sure was ruff" Read that today on my university's art wall and made me smile a bit , thought i'd share it :P

Hair Jokes More Hair Jokes

How do you get rid of chewing gum in your hair?

Cancer :)

What's the difference between Bernie Sanders and a coconut?

Coconuts have hair

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What did the newsletter say to the other newsletter when he asked for help?

Bro sure!

Why do white girls help fight heartburn?

Because they're so basic.

Simpson Jokes More Simpson Jokes

What is the favorite saying of a police officer in the Simpsons?

If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown shoot it down.

What do you call someone who doesn't like The Simpsons?

A Homerphobe! LOL! Just made that up!

Bart Jokes More Bart Jokes

How can I help you today, Mr Simpson?

BART: I don't know where my hair starts

What's Homer Simpsons favourite toy?

Bart.