Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

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Think Jokes More Think Jokes

What's the difference between Americans and Brits?

Brits think 200 miles is a long distance, Americans think 200 years is a long time.

What's the craic?

2: Not much, Brian. I had a pint yesterday. 1: Oh! Really I thought you were only 15 2: I am! 1: So what was it Guiness 2: No, it was water.

Fall Jokes More Fall Jokes

What's the difference between a 4 year old and a bag of cocaine?

Eric Clapton would never let a bag of cocaine fall out of a window. Too soon

What's the last thing you hear before a pubic hair falls to the ground?

spits*

Permission Jokes More Permission Jokes

What do you call a drunk executioner?

A dun-GIN keeper. Edit: You have my permission to post this on r/dadjokes

How many trans women does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but first they have to sit in the dark for a year and then get letters from two electricians giving them permission.

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Where do people go when they die?

Me: Heaven. 3: I don't want to go there. Me: Why not 3: It's full of dead people.

What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A: A pair of Re-bachs.

Ocean Jokes More Ocean Jokes

Why'd the guy panic and call 911 when he realized an ocean was forming around him?

It was an emergent sea.

What do you call 1000 emo kids at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Why was Linda so mad on her wedding day?

Her soon to be husband forgot how to groom.

What are you praying for?

Husband: For guidance. Wife: Pray for hardness. Leave guidance to me!!!

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

What's the difference between an M&amp?

M and a tiny mute in your tuna sandwich screaming for help? One melts in your mouth, one mouths in your melt.

How can that help in this job?

You do the math"

Yell Jokes More Yell Jokes

What are you guys yelling about?

them: YOU'RE DRIVING

What did the Mexican carpeting salesman yell to promote his business?

Underlay! Underlay!

Islamic Jokes More Islamic Jokes

What do you call an Islamic mosquito?

A 'mosque-ito'.

What happens when there are two Islamic terrorist identical brothers and one is way taller than the other?

The Twin Towers.

Grant Jokes More Grant Jokes

What kind of genie only grants wishes to men?

A misogenie.

What is your first wish?

Joe: I want to be rich. Genie: Granted. What is your second wish Rich: I want lots of money.