Permission Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Couple's Daily Question Mug

Coffee Mug

How many trans women does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just one, but first they have to sit in the dark for a year and then get letters from two electricians giving them permission.

What do you call a sick bird of prey that enters the country without permission?

An ill-eagle

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

What do you call a drunk executioner?

A dun-GIN keeper. Edit: You have my permission to post this on r/dadjokes

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Fly Jokes More Fly Jokes

What is the difference between reindeer and caribou?

Reindeer are the ones that fly.

What's brown and white and flies all over?

Thanksgiving turkey when you carve it with a chain saw!

Sit Jokes More Sit Jokes

What's blue and yellow and sits at the bottom of the pool?

A baby with slashed floaties. What's red and yellow and floats on top of the pool? Floaties with a slashed baby.

How many Arabs does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just sit in the dark and blame the Jews.

Xmas Jokes More Xmas Jokes

What do you call a snowman who cons people?

A snowfake.

What has eight arms and tells the time?

A clocktopus Shoutout to the popper from my Xmas dinner

Erdogan Jokes More Erdogan Jokes

Why wasn't the coup in Turkey on Wednesday?

Erdogan's suit wasn't back from the cleaners.

Why did Erdogan stop a man from jumping off a bridge?

One does not simply fly in Turkish airspace without Erdogan's permission.

People Jokes More People Jokes

Why don't black people like pirates?

they pronounce everything with a hard "aargh"

What do you call it when two people make a baby in fog?

A mist conception.

Christmas Jokes More Christmas Jokes

What did the blind, deaf, mute quadriplegic boy get for Christmas?

Cancer

What did Santa say when he saw your mom, sister, and girlfriend all together in the same room?

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How do you stop black kids from jumping on the bed?

Put velcro on the ceiling.

What can stop supervirus from destroying humanity ?

Batvirus ( stolen joke xD )

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

Hows your headache?

Husband: She's fine.

How a husband describe his wife?

Wife: "How would you describe me?" Husband: "ABCDEFGHIJK." Wife: "What does that mean?" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK?" Husband: "I'm just kidding!"