Islamic Jokes

What does an Islamic magician say?

ALLAH KAZAM!

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Interactive Joke of the Day Mug
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How do Muslims laugh?

Muahahahamed Note: I don't have any prejudices against Islamic people.

Why would the Holocaust have failed if the victims were Islamic?

Because it would have been impossible to get a Muslim to take a shower.

What do you call a skinny, Islamic cow?

A moo-slim.

What's an Islamic extremist's favorite baseball team?

The new york Jets

What do you call someone who just occasionally dabbles in a bit of Islamic fundamentalism?

A Wahhobbyist.

What do you do to an Islamic dog that barks too much?

Musl'im

Which is an Islamic trait?

A.heading B.heading C.heading

What would you call the Islamic State if they tried to take over Antarctica?

Ice-is I'll show myself out.

What are Islamic extremists favourite drink?

Smirnoff Isis

What happens when there are two Islamic terrorist identical brothers and one is way taller than the other?

The Twin Towers.

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What do you call an Islamic pilot?

A pilot, you racist.

Where does the Islamic botanist go to pray?

In the Mossque.

What do you call a beach where you go to shoot gorillas and break Islamic law?

Haram Bay

What do they call their mistresses in Islamic countries?

Haram Baes

Who played Gandalf in the Islamic version of Lord of the Rings?

Syrian Mckellen

Why did the Islamic woman die when she fell into the ocean?

She thought to yell for help, but her husband was nowhere around to grant her permission to do so.

What do you call an Islamic cow?

A Mooslim

How did I clear papers of Islamic Studies?

Have faith, don't question.

What do you call an Islamic mosquito?

A 'mosque-ito'.

What does Islamic extremists and skydivers have in common?

they're both Paris shooters

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End Jokes More End Jokes

What did the man say to the Formula 1 driver who nearly rear-ended him?

Thanks Verstappen.

Why is a burning candle like being thirsty ?

Beacause a little water ends both of them !

Crash Jokes More Crash Jokes

How does it feel to crash a rental car?

It Hertz.

Why did Bill Nye crash his car?

Because inertia is a property of matter.

Holocaust Jokes More Holocaust Jokes

What's the difference between the Holocaust and the Boston Marathon Bombing?

The Boston Marathon Bombing ended a race.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?

The Holocaust.

Hinduism Jokes More Hinduism Jokes

Which religion faces the most Resistance?

Hinduism... Om......

What's the one thing pacifism and Hinduism have in common?

Those who practice them don't want any beef with people.

Joke Jokes More Joke Jokes

What did the irritated man say to his inguinal hernia?

Get off my nuts!" (ps. I made this joke up yesterday... i am having hernia surgery tomorrow, and i lol'd so hard at myself that i about caused a second one to pop out)

What does Ray Charles' fictious girlfriend and this joke have in common?

They're both gold-diggers

Believe Jokes More Believe Jokes

Why can't Athiests solve exponential problems?

Because they don't believe in higher powers.

Why can't atheists solve quadratic equations?

They don't believe in higher powers.

Gps Jokes More Gps Jokes

How is Islam like a GPS?

You may think you're on the right path, but if you follow it literally, you'll end up crashing into a building.

What do you call your GPS if it has the voice of Terry Crews?

Crews Control.

Begin Jokes More Begin Jokes

When is a tree it's loudest?

When it begins to bark.

What do Windows and a submarine have in common?

If you open the windows in a submarine, your problems will begin.