Why was the animal unhappy?

He had a ruff week.. His life wasn't purrfect. His brother was a shellout. His mother's been a real crab lately. His family was really shellfish. He had no porpoise in life.

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

What is love? The energy of life. What is marriage?

The energy bill ...

What's the difference between math and meth?

One of them ruins your life. The other's just meth.

Brother Jokes More Brother Jokes

Why is your brother always flying off the handle ?

Second Boy: Because he's got a screw loose !

Who's there ! Brother ! Brother who ?

Brother-ation I've forgotten your name !

Family Jokes More Family Jokes

What do you call a family that runs a gas station?

Pump kin.

What is the difference between a call center job and a large pizza?

A large pizza can feed a family of four.

Animal Jokes More Animal Jokes

What animal has exactly 12 grams of carbon?

A mole

What animal is faster than a cheetah?

A cow dropped out of a helicopter.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

Why is 17 called the "mother-in-law" in black jack?

Because you wanna hit it, but sometimes you cant.

What do you see as your biggest weakness?

ME: INTERVIEWER: ME: MY MOTHER: He's not good at speaking up for himself

Porpoise Jokes More Porpoise Jokes

What did the depressed dolphin say?

I need a porpoise.

What do you call a sea mammal with a mission?

A porpoise.