How are strippers and Subway workers similar?

They'll both lie and tell you it's a footlong to get paid.

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Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What came first?

A chicken and an egg are lying in bed. The chicken is leaning against the headboard smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face. The egg, looking a bit ticked off, grabs the sheet, rolls over and says ... "Well, I guess we finally answered THAT question!"

How do you know a presidential candidate is lying?

Their lips are moving.

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

Why does someone who runs marathons make a good student?

Because education pays off in the long run!

Why did the circus animals go on strike?

The elephants found out that they were being paid peanuts compared to the rest of the troupe and the ringleader was taking the lions share.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell if a parrot is intelligent?

It speaks in Polly-syllables!

How do you tell a deaf person to shut up?

Here, hold this."

Subway Jokes More Subway Jokes

What should you do if you get an erection on the subway?

Get off at the next stop!

What's Jared's favorite ingredient for his Subway sandwiches?

Extra virgin oil

Stripper Jokes More Stripper Jokes

Where do strippers go on holiday ?

Poland

What do you call a bachelor party without strippers?

A: (sorry if this is the wrong forum)

Footlong Jokes More Footlong Jokes

What did the sheep obsessed convict say to Jared Fogle?

I have a footlong waiting for **ewe** back in my cell!!!!

What did Jared say when the girl asked him for a footlong?

That he only has a 6 inch.