What did Jared say when the girl asked him for a footlong?

That he only has a 6 inch.

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Why do girls never travel in odd numbers?

Because they can't even.

What do you call the girls who outrun me?

Virgins.

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What did Shakespeare say when asked how his wife keeps things interesting?

Anne hath a way."

What did the wall ask the picture?

All together now!) ***"How's it hangin' "*** Skip

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What did Jared say when the girl asked him for a footlong?

That he only has a 6 inch.

Why does Jared love 6-inch subs?

He doesn't, he likes 14-year old girls

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What did Jared say when the girl asked him for a footlong?

That he only has a 6 inch.

How are strippers and Subway workers similar?

They'll both lie and tell you it's a footlong to get paid.

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How did Jared from Subway get food poisoning?

He ate a 5 year old weiner

Why did Jared decide to gain all of his weight back?

The mall is hiring new Santas.