How do locomotives know where they're going?

Lots of training.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

What type of wife always knows where her husband is?

A widow

Why should every woman know a C++ programmer?

Because they'll always let friends access their private members. Ba dum tiss.

Lot Jokes More Lot Jokes

What do you call someone with lots of imaginary friends?

Schizofriendic

Why do pigs love Halloween?

There's lots of hogsgobblin.

Train Jokes More Train Jokes

How many trains have you derailed to date?

I replied "It's hard to keep track."

What's the difference between a school teacher and a train?

A school teacher tells you to spit out your gum, a train says choo choo.

Locomotive Jokes More Locomotive Jokes

Why are locomotive drivers so good at driving locomotives?

Because they were trained.

What kind of a car does a crazy man drive?

A LOCOmotive.