How Do You Tell 2 Scottsmen Apart?

A: You lift their kilts, and whichever one has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!!

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why did the mexican girl get pregnant?

Because her teacher told her to do an essay

Why shouldn't you tell a story to a solipsist?

Because they won't believe it.

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

Why didn't Michael J Fox order food at McDonalds?

He got the shakes instead.

Which NBA team likes McDonald's the most?

Denver Nuggets

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

How can you tell what clan a Scottish man is from?

Look under his kilt and if he has a quarter pounder then he is a McDonald.

What Do You Call an Ethiopian with A Piece of Lettuce on His Head?

A Quarter Pounder.

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What does a Scotsman wear under his kilt?

The codpiece he made out of his girlfriend's face.

What does robbing a Scotsman get you?

Kilt

Lift Jokes More Lift Jokes

Who's there ! Cricket ! Cricket who ?

Cricket neck means I can't lift anything !

What kind of trophy do I get every time I lift weights?

Hypertrophy!

Whichever Jokes More Whichever Jokes

Which presidential candidate does Tom Brady support?

Whichever can reduce inflation.

Which do you think I should take?

Whichever you'll excel in, son."