How Do You Tell 2 Scottsmen Apart?

A: You lift their kilts, and whichever one has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!!

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

Why do you want to be a librarian?

Me: "I like telling people to be quiet."

How many karma whores does it take to change a lightbulb?

When this gets 500 upvotes, I'll tell you the answer.

Mcdonald Jokes More Mcdonald Jokes

Where're you going?

Me: To dinner with my friends! Mom: Your friends Me: I'm going to use McDonalds' free Wifi to get on twitter...

What do you call a holy man who works at McDonald's?

A Friar

Quarter Pounder Jokes More Quarter Pounder Jokes

What do u call an ethopian with a slice of cheese on his head?

A quarter pounder with cheese.

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?

Quarter pounder with cheese

Kilt Jokes More Kilt Jokes

What are ye wearing to yer weddin'?

Second fella says "A kilt of course!" First fella "What's the tartin " "She's wearing white" says his pal

Why do the Scottish wear kilts?

Sheep can hear a zipper from a mile away

Lift Jokes More Lift Jokes

How do you tell 2 Scotsmen apart?

You lift their kilts, and whichever one of them has a Quarter Pounder is a McDonald!

Why does a flamingo lift up one leg ?

Because if he lifted up both legs it would fall over !

Whichever Jokes More Whichever Jokes

Which presidential candidate does Tom Brady support?

Whichever can reduce inflation.

Which do you think I should take?

Whichever you'll excel in, son."