What did Little Bo Peep say to Woody when she got caught screwing Buzz?

You got a friend in me.

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Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: 22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?

NINE!

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a giant frog?

A monster that climbs up the Empire State Building and catches aeroplanes with its tongue.

Why did the thieves get caught after robbing the Louvre?

Cause they didn't have the Monet to get Degas to make the van Gogh.

Friend Jokes More Friend Jokes

How do you know your friend has been at the gym?

Don't worry, he'll tell you.

What does a 1337 pirate call his friends?

M80

Buzz Jokes More Buzz Jokes

How do bees go to school?

They take the buzz

What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?

A Space Invader.

Woody Jokes More Woody Jokes

What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story, and a Catholic priest?

One goes limp when a child walks in the room.

What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a priest?

Only one of them goes limp when a child walks into a room.