What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

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Kid Jokes More Kid Jokes

What is that behind your ear?

Nice try, too old for the coin trick" "No it's a tumor" "Oh my god" "Kidding it's a quarter"

What is the recipe for honeymoon salad?

Lettuce alone, without dressing. I remembered this today from a joke book I had when I was a kid. Wasn't sure if it should be here or /r/dadjokes

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What do you call the first migrant off the boat?

Amhere What do you call the second migrant off the boat Amhere Azwel What do you call the third migrant off the boat Amhere Azwell Azhim

Which bug does amazing motor cycle stunts?

Second Caribou: Evel Boll Weevil.

Michael Phelps Jokes More Michael Phelps Jokes

Why does Michael Phelps make a good boyfriend?

He is a good breast-stroker.

Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?

He only Phelps himself.

Medale Jokes More Medale Jokes

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened?

and I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!"

Men Jokes More Men Jokes

What do you call a team of Christian mutant superheroes?

The A-Men

What's long and hard and full of "SEE-MEN"?

A submarine, obviously.