Medale Jokes

What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened?

and I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!"

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What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

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Paralympic Jokes More Paralympic Jokes

Whats better than winning a medal at the paralympics?

A pair of legs.

What's the difference between the Olympic long distance race and the Paralympic long distance race?

A lap

Men Jokes More Men Jokes

What did Michael Phelps say after the Mens 200m?

I would've gotten second if it weren't for you medaling kids.

Why are womens feet shorter than mens?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

Lochte Jokes More Lochte Jokes

Who robbed Lochte at the Olympics?

Phelps.

What did Lochte say after his teammates told the police what really happened?

and I would have gotten away with it if it weren't for you medaling kids!"

Jumper Jokes More Jumper Jokes

What do you call a man with a rabbit up his jumper ?

Warren !

Why doesn't Mexico win Olympic Medals?

Because all their best runners, jumpers, and swimmers are in America.

Michael Phelps Jokes More Michael Phelps Jokes

Why does Michael Phelps refuse to aid his teammates in preparing for the Olympics?

He only Phelps himself.

Why does Michael Phelps make a good boyfriend?

He is a good breast-stroker.

Swim Jokes More Swim Jokes

What don't elephants forget when they go swimming?

Their trunks.

What do you do in your free time?

I stalk. " "Really I go swimming and for long hikes" "I know.".

Runner Jokes More Runner Jokes

Did you hear about the runner who was criticized?

He just took it in stride

What do you call a race where all the runners have no legs?

An arms race.

Leg Jokes More Leg Jokes

What do you call a Chinese lady with one leg?

Irene.

What does the kid with no legs get for Christmas?

Cancer.