What do you call a philosopher that kind of wants to play soccer?

Socrates

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Why did the tree install solar panels?

It wanted to be a power plant.

What do you call a spider that wants to overthrow the government?

An anarchid.

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Why didn't Jesus play during the Isreal-Palestine soccer game?

He got suspended.

What do you call a rabbit that plays with foxes?

A dumb bunny.

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How do you get a philosopher off your porch?

Pay him for the pizza.

What do you call the man with a lisp who drowned?

A philosopher. Cuz he's a deep thinker.

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What gym did Socrates go to?

The Y.

What do you get if you cross Socrates with a dentist?

A flossopher!

Soccer Jokes More Soccer Jokes

What do you call a philosopher that kind of wants to play soccer?

Socrates

What do you call siblings that play soccer?

Umbros