What does a guy want more than anything in the world?

It doesn't matter. He has to ask his wife first.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

What do you do when you want to golf in a thunderstorm?

Hold up a 1 Iron. Not even God can hit a 1 iron.

What do you call a grandpa who couldn't understand why his email wanted to upload his attachment to share it?

An old man yelling at the cloud

World Jokes More World Jokes

How many twists does a feminist need to screw in a light bulb?

None. They just grab it and the world to revolve around them.

What goes all around the world but stays in one corner the entire time?

Stamps!

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the sniper say to his wife when he came back from work?

I missed you

Why don't you buy your wife a watch?

There's already a clock on the stove

Guy Jokes More Guy Jokes

How do you congratulate the guy who won the best tie contest?

You tell him... "that's definitely a win sir". Or if he did ok you can say you half win sir i suppose. :/

Why are most guys like floor tile?

Because if you lay them right the first time, you can walk all over them from the rest of your life!

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working?

A: Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes. No.

When you ask me a question, would you prefer the blank stare or the eye roll as a response?

I like to be prepared.

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

What would happen if Russia ran out of vodka?

Well, my dear reddit, in nature there is law of conservation of matter. Therefore, if the vodka disappeared somewhere, it would appear somewhere else. And then there would be Russia.

What did the astrophysicist say to the quark?

You matter.