What is your relationship with the plaintiff?

A: She is my daughter. Judge: Was she your daughter on February 13 1979

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Judge Jokes More Judge Jokes

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.

What did Abe Lincoln say to the judge when he asked how he pleas?

I'm in a cent.

Relationship Jokes More Relationship Jokes

What do you call a dinosaur who just got out of a relationship?

Tyrannosaurus Ex

Why do mathematicians have a hard time moving on in relationships?

Because they're always trying to find the x. They don't know y, either.

Daughter Jokes More Daughter Jokes

What's black and married to my daughter?

Nothing because I'm a good parent.

What do you call a dead skunk?

A stunk. My daughter made this up when she was about 7 years old. I thought it was incredible clever.

February Jokes More February Jokes

Which is the month in which women talk the least?

February... because it has the least number of days

What's the difference between a $20 steak and a $55 steak?

February 14th.