What job pays you to shoot people but not harm them?

A photographer.

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People Jokes More People Jokes

What is the difference between a philanthropist and Nicki Minaj?

A philanthropist likes to impress people with his larg**esse**! :-P

How do people in Nor Cal get around?

Hella copters

Pay Jokes More Pay Jokes

What do you get when someone refuses to pay the bills?

A Greek.

Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?

Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.

Shoot Jokes More Shoot Jokes

Why did the drunk Mexican shoot his wife?

Tequilher

Why do hunters close one eye before shooting?

Because if they close the other, they can't see!

Job Jokes More Job Jokes

What's the one thing a black person will never steal?

Your job.

What strengths do you bring to the job?

long pause while Jesus glares at interviewer* Are you being serious right now

Harm Jokes More Harm Jokes

What did the teacher call her intelligent yet self-harming student?

Her scar pupil.

Why did Chandler play the blues as loud as he could?

He wanted to harm monica.

Photographer Jokes More Photographer Jokes

Why is it best to ask photographers personal questions at night?

X-post r/photography) Because they open up when it gets dark.

What did the photographer say when he retired?

I can't take it anymore!"