What's a girl gotta do to get a drink?

Me: You just give the bartender your order. Her: ... Me: It's really pretty easy. Her: *leaves*

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Drink Jokes More Drink Jokes

When the neutron gets his drink, he asks, "Bartender, how much do I owe you?

The bartender replies, "For you, neutron, no charge."

What has eight arms and an IQ of 80?

Four girlfriends drinking on St Patricks Day!

Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How do you know a neighborhood is too ghetto to film in?

If most people leave before shooting starts.

Why couldn't the ex-CIA agent leave Russia?

Because he was Snowden

Girl Jokes More Girl Jokes

How do you know if a girl is ticklish?

Give her a testicle.

What did the bartender say to the girl that tried to steal a drink?

It was worth a shot.

Order Jokes More Order Jokes

What did the made-to-order breakfast dish say to Taylor Swift at the Grammys?

Omelette you finish.

What did he tell people in order to make them avoid taking it?

Eschew! Eschew!

Bartender Jokes More Bartender Jokes

Why the long pause?

asks the bartender. The bear replies "Well, I am a bear"

What did the bartender say to the gold when the gold walked into a bar?

AU, get outta here!"