What's the best thing about portugal?

You never have to carry your bags because of all the porter-geese. Thankyou, im here till monday!

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Bag Jokes More Bag Jokes

What about the two old ladies who brought a bottle of whiskey to the baseball game?

At the bottom of the fifth the bags were loaded.

What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a mercedes?

I don't have a mercedes in my garage!

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

Why can't Roman Reigns light a campfire?

Because he doesn't carry any matches!

How is Santa able to carry so many presents at once?

Santa isn't real.

Good Thing Jokes More Good Thing Jokes

What's the best thing about dark humor?

People don't take it lightly.

Whats the best thing Orlando Bloom's ever been in?

Katy Perry

M Jokes More M Jokes

What are you gonna do today?

Me: Shower. W: ...what else M: Make a new iTunes playlist. W: Wow. M: Might not have time for a shower.

Why am I just so naturally funny?

Because my life is a joke. Dont worry Im not scuicidal

Monday Jokes More Monday Jokes

What fundamental force compels physicists to go to work on Mondays?

The week force.

What do you call a person who's happy on a Monday?

Unemployed.

Portugal Jokes More Portugal Jokes

What do you call a group of people from Portugal?

Portugeese

What birds are found in Portugal ?

Portu-geese !