What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?

A: About fifty pounds.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between princess Diana and Tiger Woods?

Tiger Woods has a better driver

What's the difference between a potato and a vegetable...?

Not knowing how to use a coathanger...

Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What did the Challenger Austronaut day to his wife before he left?

You feed the kids, I'll feed the fishes."

Why do pagans make the best husbands and wives?

Because they'll worship the ground you walk on.

Pound Jokes More Pound Jokes

What do you call a man who loses pounds for a living?

A bad gambler

What is the fastest way to lose pounds?

Leave EU.

Mistress Jokes More Mistress Jokes

What's the difference between a wife and a mistress?

A: About fifty pounds.

What did the carpet enthusiast say to his mistress?

I haven't had hard wood in 15 years.