What's the difference between Jesus and his portrait ?

His portrait only need one nail

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What's the difference between a women's track team and a tribe of pygmys?

One is a cunning bunch of runts...

What is the difference between an aardvark and a coyote?

One has a long smeller the other a loud yeller!

Portrait Jokes More Portrait Jokes

What did the painter say after finishing a portrait of his brother Andrew?

I drew drew

What did the artist ask Shakespeare when he was sketching his portrait?

2B or not 2B?

Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What's your opener?

JESUS: "God loves you." You BUDDHA (crumpling paper that says Life Is Suffering): Me too

What is Jesus's go-to pickup line?

Would you like me to show you what it feels like to get nailed?

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why did Jesus take three days to resurrect after dying on the cross?

Because the date wasn't nailed down.

How do you keep a baby from crawling in circles?

nail the other hand to the floor.

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Which room will you be working out in?

Me: None of them, I just need to take a shower.

How long do you need to know someone before sharing fries?

Because I'm about to introduce myself to the girl at the end of the bar.