What's white and Irish and sits in your backyard all year?

Paddy O'Furniture

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What do you call a blonde in a closet?

Last years hide and seek champion

What did Matthew McConaughey say when he saw this year's Oscar nominees?

All white, all white, all whiiiiiiiite...

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What did the dog say when he sat on sand paper?

Ruff

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She kept sitting on Pinocchio's face and screaming "Lie to me! Lie to me!!!"

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O'Pressive.

What's the difference between Martin Luther King Jr. Day and St. Patricks Day?

Everyone want to be Irish on St. Patricks Day.

Backyard Jokes More Backyard Jokes

What's white and Irish and sits in your backyard all year?

Paddy O'Furniture

What do you do when you see your wife stumbling around in the backyard?

Shoot her again.

Paddy O'furniture Jokes More Paddy O'furniture Jokes

What's Irish and sits outside?

Paddy O'furniture

What's Irish and sits out in the rain?

Paddy o' Furniture