What u doing later?

Wife: That's not what I meant by pick up my towel. Just hand it to me, idiot.

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Whats the difference between a burglar and an ex-wife?

At least the burglar has the decency to leave you the house.

Where are the posters?

WIFE: THEY JUST DISAPPEARED! In other room *cat is furiously stuffing missing dog posters into paper shredder*

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

What is the best music to air drum to while driving?

Def Leppard, because you can keep on hand on the wheel.

What's the worst part about meeting someone with Parkinson's?

Shaking hands.

Pick Jokes More Pick Jokes

What do you get when you mix an octopus with a black guy?

Idk but it sure as hell can pick cotton

How can you tell a black lady is pregnant?

When she pulls the tampon out and the cotton is already picked.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

Why are statistics more believable with a larger sample size?

The Ns justify the means.

How many homophobes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None. They don't accept change, even if it means a brighter world.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What do u call a Mexican with a rubber toe?

Roberto

What is the integral of to the x?

The function of u to the n

Towel Jokes More Towel Jokes

What is the leading cause of dry skin?

Towels

Why do towels get dirty?

If we use towels just to dry ourselves after washing off dirt and what not. Why do they get dirty??