What would George Washington do if he were alive today?

Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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Scratch Jokes More Scratch Jokes

What did one chicken say to the other after they walked through poison ivy ?

You scratch my beak and I'll scratch yours !"

What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

Scream Jokes More Scream Jokes

What's the difference between friends and potatoes?

Potatoes don't scream when you peel their skin and toss them in boiling water.

What's red and black and screaming all over?

Stevie Wonder when he answers the iron.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

Why is the Math Book so sad?

It has so many problems! -Sorry doing a whole bunch of math today and i thought of this.

What would Elvis Presley be doing if he were alive today?

Scratching at the inside of his coffin.

Coffin Jokes More Coffin Jokes

What would Marilyn Monroe be doing if she were alive today?

Clawing at the inside of her coffin.

How can you tell vampirism is a disease?

On account of the coffin.

George Washington Jokes More George Washington Jokes

Where did George Washington keep his armies?

In his sleevies.

How did you do in your tests ?

I did what George Washington did ! What was that Went down in history !