What would u do if u won the lotto?

10yo: Buy legos & a bigger house for u. 11yo: I'd buy a monkey. Going to be extra nice to my 10yo.

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Win Jokes More Win Jokes

Why did the palm tree win the plant race?

It was the first to Sago.

Why didn't the bear from the revenant win the Oscar?

Because it would've torn Leo up to receive another Oscar loss

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why did you buy me a pair of bunny ears?

I wanted you to have a hoppy birthday!

Why don't you buy sunscreen from Steve Irwin?

Because it doesn't protect you from harmful rays

Monkey Jokes More Monkey Jokes

What did the Banana say to the Monkey?

Yo You peel me

What do you get when you mix a monkey and a midget?

Tom Cruise

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

Where were u on the nite of the 5th?

Stabbing a guy. "Louder for the tape." leans in Grabbing a pie. I went out for pie.

What noise does a Nintendo ambulance make?

Wii-u-Wii-u-Wii-u-Wii-u-Wii-u

10yo Jokes More 10yo Jokes

What the hell is albatrout?

That's not real. 10yo: Now you're in doubt! Me: But... 10yo: ALBATROUT

What's a VCR?

My 10yo instantly making me feel like the oldest person who has ever lived. I need calcium chews for my brittle bones.