10yo: Buy legos & a bigger house for u. 11yo: I'd buy a monkey. Going to be extra nice to my 10yo.
They turn off their Xbox.
I don't know, I don't have 2020 vision.
A: A hog doesn't have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night just so he can f*** some pig.
Because when they buy souvenirs they find out they were made in China.
A Meringueutan
So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Shows you it works then. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys picking cherries.
Good Mourning! *(this pun is baaad and I feel terrible about it)*
That's not real. 10yo: Now you're in doubt! Me: But... 10yo: ALBATROUT
My 10yo instantly making me feel like the oldest person who has ever lived. I need calcium chews for my brittle bones.