What would u do if u won the lotto?

10yo: Buy legos & a bigger house for u. 11yo: I'd buy a monkey. Going to be extra nice to my 10yo.

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Win Jokes More Win Jokes

How does a snail win a race?

It runs against Hillary.

Why does Cinderella never win the Olympics?

She has a pumpkin for a coach and runs away from the ball.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why did the fishermen buy a new pole?

Just for the halibut.

Why did Snow White buy an android phone?

She thought the apple was poisoned.

Monkey Jokes More Monkey Jokes

What did Mrs Revere say when Paul got on a gorilla to warn the farmers that the British were coming?

Paul stop monkeying around!

Why do elephants paint their testicles red?

So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Shows you it works then. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys picking cherries.

U. Jokes More U. Jokes

What is a Brit's favorite letter?

You'd think it would be "T", but it is "U". *Favourite, btw.

Why did u jump off that bridge?

My friend did it too "Well if your friend jumped off a bridge would u " Yes. I literally just said that

10yo Jokes More 10yo Jokes

What the hell is albatrout?

That's not real. 10yo: Now you're in doubt! Me: But... 10yo: ALBATROUT

What's a VCR?

My 10yo instantly making me feel like the oldest person who has ever lived. I need calcium chews for my brittle bones.