Why did the beer get bottled?

He was trying to dodge the draft.

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Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why did the Mexican try to wear his taco?

He was dyslexic.

Who said that just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you could neglect to do your work around here?

Secretary: My lawyer.

Beer Jokes More Beer Jokes

How many dwarves does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two one to hold the bulb and the other to serve him beer until the room starts spinning.

Why do you have to take more than one Baptist with you when you go fishing?

Because if you just take one, he'll drink all your beer.

Draft Jokes More Draft Jokes

How do you write an essay that blows people away?

With lots of drafts

What does one call an undertaker that's been drafted into the Military?

A Corpseman. Painfully obvious, yet a terrible play on the English language, I know. It was something I came up with a few years ago, for some unknown reason.

Dodge Jokes More Dodge Jokes

What's faster than a black man dodging cops with a TV?

His brother with the laptop.

Who is the prettiest of my friends?

Me: your mother, why W: Stop acting like you're 12. M: (thinking) I dodged that bullet again.