Why did the boy take the ruler to bed?

He wanted to see how long he slept.

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What do Australians say when they go to bed?

G'night mate

When someone ask me... How are you?

I answer back... You mean in bed

Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the vampire baby stop having baby food?

He wanted something to get his teeth into.

What do you call a yak that wants to talk to you about a network marketing opportunity?

A cognac

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

Why aren't you mowing the lawn?

Link: It's raining Z: No it's not L: *Plays Song of Storms* Z: You're sleeping with Epona tonight

What do you mean you can't sleep?

It's so easy I could do it with my eyes close! Me: *walks away*

Boy Jokes More Boy Jokes

Why are teenage girls so much better at English than boys?

Girls, like, have a much better, like, grasp of, like, similes.

What does train tracks and breast have in common?

They are both ment for boys but in the end it's the men who plays with them

Ruler Jokes More Ruler Jokes

Why do Republicans use rulers?

They want everything to be straight.

Why are you prodding me with that ruler?

Im measuring your patience"