Why did the dyslexic man have slime on his face?

Because I told him a good joke.

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What's the best joke you ever heard?

For me, it's gotta be Emo Phillips' Baptist joke. Although to tell it you've gotta get his execution down.

What did the French guy say when he forgot to tell his driver to turn left?

Oh, gosh!

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What's the difference between a garbanzo pea and a chick pea?

I've never had a garbanzo pea on my face.

What's the difference between garbanzo beans an chickpeas?

I don't have to play $50 for a garbanzo bean in my face.

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Why are there so many good jokes about feminists?

Well, they're huge targets...

What's the key to a good joke?

Timing.

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Why did the dyslexic man have slime on his face?

Because I told him a good joke.

What did the dyslexic man do when life gave him lemons?

He made melon-ade

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How does a monster begin a fairy tale?

Once upon a slime . . ."

What did the slug say as he slipped down the window very fast?

How slime flies!