When I fix someone's computer and they say "Wow how'd you do that?

I tell them I'm a wizard then throw glitter in their face.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How can you tell that a straight pin is confused?

Just look at it. It's headed in one direction and pointed in the other.

What can I get for you, Ma'am?

She says "Nothing, just wanted to tell you I'm vegan."

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

Whenever I shut down my computer, it asks, "Are you sure you want to shut down your computer?

Then I wonder if it knows something I don't.

When I fix someone's computer and they say "Wow how'd you do that?

I tell them I'm a wizard then throw glitter in their face.

Face Jokes More Face Jokes

How long are you going to keep throwing that in my face?

Netflix: Because you watched "The Wedding Planner"

How do you stop a clown from laughing?

Hit it in the face with an axe.

Throw Jokes More Throw Jokes

How do Chinese people name their babies?

A: They throw them down the stairs to see what noise they make.

Why was Hillary thrown out of a restaurant?

She trashed the bill. Alt punch line 1 (u/Causative): She demanded her own private server and tried to have her meals removed.

Wizard Jokes More Wizard Jokes

Why did the wizard ask a pretty chick to throw a heavy box on him ?

Not just the hard on............ it would've made him more flexible

Why is Bill Cosby like the The Wizard of Oz?

Cosby Cosby Cosby Cosby cos, because of the wonderful things he drugs

Fix Jokes More Fix Jokes

What does the cabbage merchant use to fix his cabbages?

A cabbage patch! - Sokka

What happened to German Orphans after WW2?

Did they ever get back on the Reich track (I saw the post in /r/history earlier and was disappointed to find it was a serious question. I fixed it.)

Glitter Jokes More Glitter Jokes

What is a blonde's favorite color?

Glitter.

When I fix someone's computer and they say "Wow how'd you do that?

I tell them I'm a wizard then throw glitter in their face.