Why do so few men end up in Heaven?

They never stop to ask directions.

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

What do you call it when a man has a beer in each hand?

Irish handcuffs.

What's the difference between a man in plain clothes riding a unicycle and a man in a tuxedo riding a bike?

Attire

Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

Why did the liontamer stop using WinZip?

because lions only understand .rars

Why did Heisenberg remove the speedometer from his car?

So he would stop getting lost everything he checked it.

Ask Jokes More Ask Jokes

Why do you need a door then?

I asked him.

Who likes music?

asks a commander. - Two soldiers step forward. - All right. I bought a piano. Take it to my apartment on the fourth floor.

End Jokes More End Jokes

What's the difference between the Holocaust and the Boston Marathon Bombing?

The Boston Marathon Bombing ended a race.

What's the difference between a optimist, a pessimist and a realist?

The optimist sees the light at the end of the tunnel. The pessimist sees nothing. And the realist sees the train.

Direction Jokes More Direction Jokes

What direction does a Walter White-themed GPS tell you to turn?

Goddamn right.

Why do so few men end up in Heaven?

They never stop to ask directions.

Heaven Jokes More Heaven Jokes

Where do children that die home alone go?

HEAVEN!!

What do you call a sacred, flammable piece of wood?

A match made in Heaven.