Why is it so hard to play cards in the jungle?

There are too many cheetahs. Courtesy of the St. Louis Zoo Facebook page.

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What do kids yell at old people who are just trying to play?

GET OFF MY LAN!

Why didn't the dog play cards on his ocean cruise?

Because the captain stood on the deck.

Card Jokes More Card Jokes

Why couldn't the pirate play cards?

A: Because he was sitting on the deck !

Why didn't the sailors play cards on the deck?

Because the captain was sitting on the top of the deck.

Cheetah Jokes More Cheetah Jokes

Why do felines always win board games?

Because they are cheetahs.

Why don't they play CS:GO in the jungle?

too many cheetahs

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Why do elephants paint their testicles red?

So they can hide in cherry trees. Ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree? Shows you it works then. What's the loudest noise in the jungle? Monkeys picking cherries.

Why couldn't you trust the king of the jungle?

He was a lion.

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What is the president's favorite vegetable?

BARACK-oli. Courtesy of my friend Abraham.

What do you get when you cross a mountain climber and a mosquito?

You can't. A mosquito is a vector and the mountain climber is a scaler. Courtesy of my physics professor.