Whats the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

When I drop a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around for a week.

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Difference Jokes More Difference Jokes

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause?

With Santa it is only three hoes and he's done.

What's the difference between friends and potatoes?

Potatoes don't scream when you peel their skin and toss them in boiling water.

S Jokes More S Jokes

Whats the difference between a chickpea and a lima bean?

I've never had a lima bean on my face.

Whats green and flies?

Super Pickle

Mom Jokes More Mom Jokes

What did Santa say when he saw your mom, sister, and girlfriend all together in the same room?

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Whatcha making?

Mom: Dill bread. Me: So, do you have yeast on your dill dough Mom: Get out.

Drop Jokes More Drop Jokes

Why did the little girl drop her ice cream?

She got hit by a bus. Sequel: Why did the little girl's sister drop her ice cream Someone threw a fridge at her.

What's the difference between a blond and a washing machine?

When you drop a load into a washing machine it doesn't follow you around for a week.

Follow Jokes More Follow Jokes

How do you find Will Smith in winter?

You follow the Fresh Prince

Why does lightning only strike the French?

Because it follows the path of least resistance

Week Jokes More Week Jokes

Who's there ! Amelia ! Amelia who ?

Amelia a package last week - did you get it !

What would you call an additional day added to the week?

Sumday

Load Jokes More Load Jokes

What do you do with spoiled fish food?

Load it in the chum dumpster.

What are you supposed to do when someone is having a seizure in the bath?

throw a load of dirty laundry in.

Washing Machine Jokes More Washing Machine Jokes

What's the difference between a woman and a laundry machine?

When I dump a load in the washing machine it doesn't follow me around after

What's the difference between your mom and a washing machine?

If I dump a load in a washing machine it doesn't follow me around for the next few weeks.