Richard Nixon Jokes

What's Richard Nixon's favorite game?

I spy.

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What did Richard Nixon say after he tried to make dinner at the White House for the first time?

I am not a cook

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Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery?

Q: Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery? A: Because her career as a comic was stuck, but no matter how he tried, the Dr. couldn't pull a laugh out of her.

Why isn't Sean Connery allowed to play Super Mario Bros. any more?

He kept trying to shave the princess.

Cook Jokes More Cook Jokes

Why make us select "cook" at all?

Does my appliance have a calculator function or something Sincerely, Everyone

What us the difference between white, brown and black people?

The time God took to cook us

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How do spies send secret messages in a forest?

A: By moss code.

Why did the spy steal the laptop?

It had a sticker that said 'intel inside'.

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Who lives there?

The yellow man lives in the yellow house. The purple man lives in the purple house. The red man in the red house. And the blue man in the blue house. So who lives in the White House? The black man. It's better in person, I'm so sorry.

What did Richard Nixon say after he tried to make dinner at the White House for the first time?

I am not a cook

Dinner Jokes More Dinner Jokes

What did the man say when the lobster gave him food poisoning?

I'm not letting you cook dinner again

What's the easiest way to get off an elephant?

I don't know but you should buy it dinner first!

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What's ten inches long and white?

Not a damn thing! I thought it was time we had some racist jokes towards someone who isn't black for once D

What is true and false at the same time?

This