Rio De Janeiro Jokes

How are Oscar the Grouch and the Olympic Diving Pools in Rio de Janeiro similar?

They're both green, smell like farts, and will stay that way for 47 years.

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What did the Russian athlete say when he was stung by a mosquito during the Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro?

zika blyat

What Pokemon would you catch in Rio De Janeiro?

Zikachu.

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What do you get when you cross an insomniac with an agnostic and a dyslexic?

A person who stays up at night, wondering if there's a dog.

How do churches stay so strong?

They pray on the weak.

Oscar Jokes More Oscar Jokes

Why did Leonardo DiCaprio laugh at the Oscar joke?

Because he finally got it

What's the real reason Lego Movie didn't get nominated for an Oscar?

They thought it was called "The Leo Movie".

Pokemon Jokes More Pokemon Jokes

How do you get Squirtle, Charmander and Pikachu onto a bus?

You pokemon.

What does Pokemon Go and a policeman have in common?

You gotta catch Jamal

Grouch Jokes More Grouch Jokes

How are Oscar the Grouch and the Olympic Diving Pools in Rio de Janeiro similar?

They're both green, smell like farts, and will stay that way for 47 years.

What's the difference between Oscar the grouch and a grouch at the Oscars?

Ones green and the other is black

Russian Jokes More Russian Jokes

What did the Russian people light their houses with before they started using candles?

Electricity.

Why do Russian cars have such a bad rep?

Because they're always Stalin.

Summer Olympics Jokes More Summer Olympics Jokes

Why isn't Mexico in the Summer Olympics?

Everyone who can run, jump, and swim are already over here.

What did the Russian athlete say when he was stung by a mosquito during the Summer Olympics in Rio de Janeiro?

zika blyat

Zikachu Jokes More Zikachu Jokes

What Pokemon would you catch in Rio De Janeiro?

Zikachu.

What do you call a Pikachu caught in Brazil?

A Zikachu

Mosquito Jokes More Mosquito Jokes

What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a rock climber?

Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scalar.

How many mosquitoes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. But I don't know how they got in there.