How are men like carpet tiles?

If you lay them properly the first time around you can walk all over them for the rest of your life.

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Life Jokes More Life Jokes

Why am I just so naturally funny?

Because my life is a joke. Dont worry Im not scuicidal

Who's Angry in Japan?

The director of Life of Pi.

Man Jokes More Man Jokes

How many Vietnam Vets does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: YOU DON'T KNOW, MAN, YOU WEREN'T THERE!!! YOU DON'T KNOW!!!

What did the fish say to the man draining its aquarium?

WATER YOU DOING

Lay Jokes More Lay Jokes

How's your love life?

Well, I went on a date. 45 minutes in I realized it was a turtle in a wig. "I'm sorry man" it's ok. still got laid.

What do women and linoleum have in common?

If you lay them just right you can walk on them for years.

Walk Jokes More Walk Jokes

Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes?

The first knows how to read the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

What did the zombie say when he walked into the wrong tomb?

I have made a grave mistake.

Rest Jokes More Rest Jokes

How many members of an ethnicity does it take to perform a specified task?

A finite number! One member to perform the task, and the rest to behave in a manner stereotypical to the ethnicity in question.

Why did Clemson choose orange as its team color?

So they could play football on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up garbage the rest of the week.