How did the police determine which turtle ate the diamond ring?

They conducted an in-turtle investigation.

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Police Jokes More Police Jokes

What do you call a midget fortune teller running from the police?

A small medium at large.

What do the Police, the NFL and Black Lives Matter all have in common?

They all have the same PR guy.

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

What did the cannibal wipe with . . . . . . after he ate some people at the library?

Pages from *Reader's Digest*

What'd you call this again?

Alien Chef: OH MY GOD YOU ATE MY GRANDMOTHER!

Turtle Jokes More Turtle Jokes

What do you call a turtle with a hard on?

A slow poke.

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.

Determine Jokes More Determine Jokes

How does a boat captain determine his profit?

By using aquadratic equation. (Via my coworker)

How did the police determine which turtle ate the diamond ring?

They conducted an in-turtle investigation.

Conduct Jokes More Conduct Jokes

How do u know if a company that just hired you conducts drug tests?

What is the likelihood it will be a hairtest

What was the musician doing when he was struck by lightning?

He was conducting.