How did the puppeteer meet the President?

Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery?

Q: Why did Joan Rivers die during throat surgery? A: Because her career as a comic was stuck, but no matter how he tried, the Dr. couldn't pull a laugh out of her.

Why do the lawyers for the reindeer say they have to pull Santa's sled?

Because they have a claus in their contract.

Meet Jokes More Meet Jokes

What's the best thing about Alzheimer's?

You meet new people every day.

How did the tiny frozen dinner meet the little kid's belly?

microwave

President Jokes More President Jokes

What did the Mexican wife say to her Husband?

You'll never be president, Jeb.

What do Lewinsky, Monroe, and Reddit have in common?

They all went down on a President.

String Jokes More String Jokes

What's more fun than swinging a dead baby by a string?

Stopping it with a shovel!

What do elephants use for tampons?

Sheep. Why do elephants have trunks? Sheep don't have strings.

Puppeteer Jokes More Puppeteer Jokes

Why did the puppeteer get out of jail?

Because he "pulled a few strings"!

How did the puppeteer meet the President?

He pulled some strings.