How many mothers-in-law does it take to change a light bulb?

One. She just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around her.

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

How does Kanye West screw in a lightbulb?

He holds the lightbulb and the world revolves around him.

What do you get when you hold two green balls tightly in your hand?

A leprachaun's undivided attention.

Change Jokes More Change Jokes

How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They can't get up that high!

How many feminists does it takes to change a lightbulb?

One. ###And it's NOT funny!!!

Light Bulb Jokes More Light Bulb Jokes

How many Mennonites does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven - one to actually change the bulb and six to complain that they liked the old one better.

How many white people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them. One to hold the bulb and the rest to screw the world.

Wait Jokes More Wait Jokes

What's a blind man doing on a boat?

Waiting for a bus.

What should you do if a vampire borrows your comic?

Wait for him to give it back.

Mother Jokes More Mother Jokes

What did the ant whisper into the elephant's ear that made the elephant faint?

I'm going to be the mother of your children." I have no idea whether the joke is lost in translation...

What kind of dance does your mother do?

The MOMbo.

Law Jokes More Law Jokes

What do you call someone who tells you they've successfully broken the Law of Excluded Middle?

WRONG.** ... or right, or something in between.

Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?

Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.

Revolve Jokes More Revolve Jokes

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One. They stick the bulb in the socket and wait for the world to revolve around them!

How do feminists screw in a lightbulb?

By holding the bulb up to the socket and waiting for the world to revolve around them EDIT: Rip inbox EDIT 2: Thanks for the gold!