How many times should you try starting your snowblower before you realize it's not going to start?

According to my neighbor it's 458 times.

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Start Jokes More Start Jokes

What do you call an alligator that starts something?

An insti-GATOR!

Why did the hacker start selling his services?

So he could make his 4Chan.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

Why was Cloud trying to cheer up Sky?

He looked a little blue

How do you know if a Chinese man has robbed your house?

Your homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later, he's still trying to back out of your driveway.

Accord Jokes More Accord Jokes

How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb?

None. According to Trump, they outsourced it to India & China.

Why was Edward unable to get out of Russia?

Because he was Snowd en! (according to my friends this joke has been around for awhile, but I hadn't seen it yet, and wanted to share the goof)

Realize Jokes More Realize Jokes

How do you know that you're a peaceful country?

When you realize that you can't spell country without UN.

Why did the watermelon and the honeydew decide to cancel their spontaneous wedding in Las Vegas?

They realized with a family like theirs, they really Cantaloupe.

Neighbor Jokes More Neighbor Jokes

How did Mister Baggins know when his neighbor had died?

He read it in the Hobbituary.

What did Larry McMurtry say when his neighbor asked to borrow a bar of soap?

He said "Sure! I could loan some Dove".

Snowblower Jokes More Snowblower Jokes

Why did the Snowman pull his pants down?

Because the snowblower was coming.

Why did the snowman pull down his pants?

Because he saw the snowblower coming