What did Jesus said to his girlfriend in the morning?

Damn, you really nailed me last night.

This joke may have profanity.
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Jesus Jokes More Jesus Jokes

What is Jesus' favorite video game on earth?

I am bread.

What was the first reference to pole vaulting in the Bible?

When Jesus cleared the temple.

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why did Jesus take three days to resurrect after dying on the cross?

Because the date wasn't nailed down.

What did the Romans say to each other after crucifying Jesus?

Nailed it!"

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What's the best way to break up with your girlfriend?

On the front page of reddit.

Why are relationships complex?

Because you're real, but your girlfriend is imaginary

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

What shape is your hair in the morning?

A wrecktangle. (Made up by my 10 year old daughter :)

What did the cow say to the paintbrush?

Moo. As told by my kid this morning.

Night Jokes More Night Jokes

What has more lives than a cat?

A frog -- it croaks every night.

What do you do when you get to the top of the world's tallest mountain?

Have a rest. (Everest, get it?) Really awful joke, but I thought of it last night and was wondering if anyone recognised it? Who knows, it might be original....