What did the husband say to his wife when he tried pushing it in as much as he could, but it still wouldn't fit?

He said "I'm going to try on a different shoe size."

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Whats the emergency?

My wife is suffocating me -Literally or figuratively sir Well thats a stupid question. How would I be talking

However, a man goes home and tells his wife about it. How is this possible?

He wasn't single.

Try Jokes More Try Jokes

What do the Syrian refugees and water have in common?

They both keep trying to get on our shores....

What does the hippy say when you try to kick them off your couch?

Namaste.

Push Jokes More Push Jokes

Why did Sally fall down the hill?

I pushed her.

How do you make a Swiss Roll?

Push him down a hill. BONUS: How do you make French Wine? Invade.

Husband Jokes More Husband Jokes

What do you call a wife that knows where her husband is at all time?

A widow

Why can't witches have babies?

Because their husbands have hollow-weenies.

Fit Jokes More Fit Jokes

What kind of medicine do you give a kid having a fit?

An anti-hissy-tamine.

Whats the hardest thing about microwaving vegtables?

fitting the wheelchair in the microwave.