What did the police say to the man who wouldn't go to sleep?

He's resisting a rest!"

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Man Jokes More Man Jokes

Why did the man break up with his girlfriend who had a lazy eye?

Because she was seeing somebody on the side.

What did you hear about the man who fell into the upholstery machine...?

I heard that he was fully re-covered.

Sleep Jokes More Sleep Jokes

What is dark, invades you in your sleep, and starts with N-I-G?

Nightmares you racist.

What is the biggest similarity between the average Redditor and a lumberjack?

They both sleep all night and whack all day!

Police Jokes More Police Jokes

How did the police determine which turtle ate the diamond ring?

They conducted an in-turtle investigation.

Why were the police at the day care?

Because some of the two-year-olds were resisting a rest.

Rest Jokes More Rest Jokes

Why did the cop shoot the insomniac?

He was resisting a rest

Why are Saturday and Sunday so strong?

Because the rest are weekdays.

Resist Jokes More Resist Jokes

Why did the police shoot the black insomniac?

He resisted a rest.

Why were the police at the day care?

Because some of the two-year-olds were resisting a rest.