Wow, I did not expect this post to blow up
He burned his lips on the exhaust pipe.
Because the Jihad.
Three. One to get the punchline, and one to point out the math is wrong.
BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE
gloves! nah don't know, it hasn't opened the present yet
Open the door. Put in the elephant. Close the door.
Did they ever get back on the Reich track (I saw the post in /r/history earlier and was disappointed to find it was a serious question. I fixed it.)
I'll post the answer tomorrow.
None. They just hold it in the socket and expect the world to revolve around them.
Hehe... 'screw' Alternatively: 69, but everyone expects that one.
Wrap your package before you shove it down the chimney.
Give it two test-tickles.