What do you need to teach a blonde who ...

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

How many Lutherans does it take to change a lightbulb?

Change Why do we need change (It's cool, I go to a Lutheran church)

How about something personal?

Me: Personally I need a job.

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

Why did Sherlock Holmes not want a second cup of tea in the emergency room?

Because it was More ER Tea.

What did the irritated man say to his inguinal hernia?

Get off my nuts!" (ps. I made this joke up yesterday... i am having hernia surgery tomorrow, and i lol'd so hard at myself that i about caused a second one to pop out)

Accident Jokes More Accident Jokes

How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?

A: Be too drunk to find your keys.

What do you call Christopher Reeve before the accident?

Christopher Walken.

Teach Jokes More Teach Jokes

Why did man invent the shipping cart?

To teach women how to stand on their hind legs.

How many lost cats walk by the telephone pole with their missing flier on it?

Just another reason to teach your cat to read.

Second Gear Jokes More Second Gear Jokes

Why is Joey Tribbiani a presenter on the new Top Gear?

It doesn't make sense, he and all his friends are always stuck in second gear

What do you need to teach a blonde who never had an accident in 20 years?

Second gear.

20 Year Jokes More 20 Year Jokes

How are women and linoleum floors alike?

You lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them for the next 20 years.

Why would Rip Van Winkle make a good janitor?

Because he swept for 20 years.