What does it mean if a dude looks down and sees four balls instead of two?

He needs to be very careful, because he may be getting screwed.

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Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?

Just two. One to explain to the public that everything possible is being done to solve the problem, and the other to screw the lightbulb into the water faucet.

How many Honor Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: 22 one to screw it in 21 to shoot the bulb.

Look Jokes More Look Jokes

Why did the rooster get 20 years in prison?

He got caught on the internet, looking up chicks.

How does every black guy joke start?

By looking over your shoulder!

Need Jokes More Need Jokes

Why did the pirate update his Macbook?

His matey told him he needed an iPatch

What is the best offensive joke you have? Can you make me laugh?

Read all the other threads. I need new content. The old stuff is getting, well old. Here's my contribution. Have you head of the new drinking game? The mike brown special: stand there and take 12 shots. What's the difference between mike brown and a college kid? College kids can handle more shots before they fall down.

Ball Jokes More Ball Jokes

Why is a pool table green?

Well you'd be green too if someone racked your balls.

Why did you kick that ball straight at the school computer?

Pupil: You told me to put it in the Net.

Mean Jokes More Mean Jokes

What did Chris Christie say when asked if he had plans to run in the 2016 presidential election?

After giving it a substantial amount of thought and discussing it with my advisors, I've decided against it. I mean, I'd love to, and I appreciate those who'd support me, but I feel like I wouldn't be able to take the stress mentally- and physically." After being asked what physical stress he'd experience, he responded: "I don't think I'd be able to handle that much running."

Who is missing an egg?

there are 27 people in the room but on 53 eggs, you know what that means, someone is missing an egg.

Dude Jokes More Dude Jokes

What did one crow say to the other?

Caw dude

How old is your girlfriend?

She's52" "Haha, dude, she could be your mom!" "Yeah, actually it's yours"