What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.

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Burn Jokes More Burn Jokes

How many Grateful Dead fans does it take to change a lightbulb?

They don't change it. They just watch it burn out, then follow it around for another 15 years.

Why did the movie critic give the movie he received on a burned disc a 3.14/5?

Because it was pi-rated.

Slice Jokes More Slice Jokes

Who's there ! Buddha ! Buddha who ?

Buddha this slice of bread for me !

What do you call a slice of bread from another country?

An immigraint.

Case Jokes More Case Jokes

What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

A programmer puts two glasses on his bedside table before going to sleep.

A full one, in case he gets thirsty, and an empty one, in case he doesn’t.

Wish Jokes More Wish Jokes

What did the pillar say when he forgot to wish his friend happy birthday?

I'll column later.

Whats your first wish?

Dave: I wish I was rich. Genie: Granted, what's your second wish Rich: I want lots of money.

Burn Toast Jokes More Burn Toast Jokes

What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.

What's worse than 1 slice of burnt toast?

The holocaust.

Pregnant Girlfriend Jokes More Pregnant Girlfriend Jokes

What's the difference between a light bulb and my pregnant girlfriend?

I can unscrew a lightbulb.

What has a slice of burnt toast and a pregnant girlfriend got in common?

In both cases you wish you took it out a few seconds earlier.