When she read the order back to me she said, "So, you have one thick sausage, anything else?

I looked her dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, I also ordered a pizza."

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

When the hostess at the restaurant says "table for two?

I always like to look surprised and whisper "you can see her too ".

Why are the waiters in here so nasty?

Waiter: Look at who they have to serve.

Pizza Jokes More Pizza Jokes

What's the difference between a pizza, and this joke?

One has cheese on it, the other's just plain cheesy.

What's the best thing to put into a pizza?

Your teeth.

Read Jokes More Read Jokes

Who reads the news AND makes coffee?

Katie Keurig. (I know the setup might need some work but I just like the punchline I made up.)

Why did the Polish couple decide to have only 4 children?

A: They'd read in the newspaper that one out of every five babies born in the world today is Chinese.

Eye Jokes More Eye Jokes

Why do the KGB operate in groups of three?

A. "One can read, one can write and one to keep an eye on the two intellectuals."

What do you call a three-legged donkey?

A wonkey. What do you call a three-legged donkey with one eye? A winky-wonkey.

Order Jokes More Order Jokes

How does batman order his iced water?

Can I get that..Just ice"

Why are you ordering so many drinks?

The dog responds, "I've had a ruff day."

Reply Jokes More Reply Jokes

How did you get here?

he asked. And the new angel replied "Flu..."

How many women have you slept with My wife asked me, "How many women have you slept with?

I proudly replied, "Only you, Darling. With all the others I was awake."