Why can't you be the king I know?

The king you have inside you SIMBA: That doesn't make sense. I think I'd remember if I ate a king.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How do you know that Hogwarts is feminist friendly?

The entrance is a dumbledore.

How do you know?

My phone is turned off.

Think Jokes More Think Jokes

Where do you think you're going at this hour?

gun hangs head & turns around

What's a pirates favourite letter?

You may think it's "Arrr", but nay, his first love be the "C".

Eat Jokes More Eat Jokes

What did the cop say to the doughnut as he ate it?

Rest in **police**.

Who ate those tomatoes?

Tom ate those.

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What is the recipe for honeymoon salad?

Lettuce alone, without dressing. I remembered this today from a joke book I had when I was a kid. Wasn't sure if it should be here or /r/dadjokes

How do you remember your wedding anniversary?

Forget it once.

King Jokes More King Jokes

How do the Lanisters make large beds?

They put two twins together to make a king.

How did the king die?

He had a bad heir day

Simba Jokes More Simba Jokes

Why did Simba have trouble returning to Pride Rock?

He ran into trafiki.

Why is Simba an orphan?

A: Because his dad couldn't Mufasa 'nuff

Sense Jokes More Sense Jokes

What would you say about someone who li kes to tell cancer jokes?

That he has a sense of tumor (Courtesy of twitter.com/sorryforthelolz)

Whats the difference between congress and a US mint?

One of them makes sense!