What did you learn in kindergarten today?

5-year-old: A doughnut would help me remember. Apparently she learned bribery.

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Today Jokes More Today Jokes

What does Uncle Vernon not do today?

Post.

What was the humor like back then?

I was just wondering about how many jokes today maybe irrelevant 100 years into the future. To test this theory, what are the oldest recorded jokes?

Remember Jokes More Remember Jokes

What did you learn in kindergarten today?

5-year-old: A doughnut would help me remember. Apparently she learned bribery.

Why do elephants and stoners get along so well?

uh.. I don't remember..

Learn Jokes More Learn Jokes

Why couldn't the pirate learn the alphabet?

Because he was always lost at C!

Who needs to watch the #SOTU when I can just read my TL?

Here's what I've learned so far: John Boehner is still orange.

Help Jokes More Help Jokes

Why do you keep going back to that fishing website?

I can't help it I'm hooked.

Which wizard can help you tone up your arms and upper body?

Dumbbelldor.

5 Year Old Jokes More 5 Year Old Jokes

Why is it a bad idea to give Elsa a balloon?

Because she'll "Let it go! Let it go!" This joke was made up by my 5 year old nephew.

What do you call a cow that can't moo?

A milk dud Credit to my 5 year old nephew

Kindergarten Jokes More Kindergarten Jokes

What's the difference between the ISIS headquarters and a kindergarten?

I don't know, I just fly the drone.

What do you get when a truck full of potatoes drives into kindergarten full of kids?

Moussaka

Doughnut Jokes More Doughnut Jokes

What does the Pillsbury Doughboy see when he looks down?

His Doughnuts.

What did the doughnut say to the cop?

Don't glaze me, bro