Why did it take the computer so long to decide whether it wanted to buy an Egyptian cotton sheet?

Because it had too many threads.

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Want Jokes More Want Jokes

Why did the hipster decide to drown himself in the tributary?

He didn't want to be mainstream.

What kind of cheese?

Me: "American..." Her: "Want it toasted " Me: "I'll just make it myself."

Decide Jokes More Decide Jokes

How are the band "The Scorpions" and rural shepherds alike?

They just wanna be loved by ewe. Made up this joke/pun at work the other day (I'm sure I'm not the first), decided to subject you all to it. All apologies to shepherds who are not physical with your sheep.

Why did Burger King decide to partner with Dairy Queen instead of McDonalds?

Because she unwrapped his Whopper. I'm so sorry!!!

Computer Jokes More Computer Jokes

What do you call a computer with an amazing singing voice?

A Dell.

What do you get if you cross a constable with a computer?

PC Plod.

Buy Jokes More Buy Jokes

Why didn't the man buy Velcro shoes?

because they were a rip off

What does the head of the Catholic Church used to buy goods online?

Papal

Thread Jokes More Thread Jokes

What is it called when you walk away from your banana cream pie in the Sahara?

Deserting your dessert in the desert. I feel some banana jokes about to be inserted in this thread tho

What's both blue and purple and never seen again?

This thread :/

Egyptian Jokes More Egyptian Jokes

What did the Pharaohs use to keep their babies quiet?

Egyptian dummies.

Why was the Egyptian kid confused?

Because his daddy was a mummy